Saturday, August 9, 2014

It doesn't look good on being ready...

Unfortunately, it doesn't seem like I'll be ready to travel when my time comes. I still won't have a choice, as my only other option is to stay homeless in the same location. If i'm going to homeless I figured I may as well travel, but I can't find a proper backpack let alone decent camping gear. I found a bike I love, and would be prefect for the road - for $600, that is. I didn't even bother to price the trailers. My laptop is old and becoming more busted everyday, and it's becoming more of a hassle to move around town with, let alone take it on the road. It's so old it takes up too much power to plug into shared power ports. And, it HAS to be plugged in to operate because the battery is old, and doesn't go unplugged for more than 7 minutes. I can't complain about it too much because it's better than nothing right now, but it doesn't seem like it will do me any good while I'm traveling. No one's going to want to trade it for anything of real value because it's so old - I'm stuck with it. The new laptop I picked out is $600, and the tablet is $300. I want to send my valuables home to my parents, but that costs money I don't have and it doesn't look like I will have. I don't want to have to sell them. They're valuable to me, but not to someone else to get enough money to make it worth losing.

I just don't know what I'm going to do. I want to be in at least a decent state of being able to travel on my own, instead of having to do it the hard way - being carry everything I can fit into a small normal type backpack and literally walk my journey. It's also going to be sometime in January when all the shelters are likely to be full, if I'm very landed in a place with shelters.

This is turning out to look like something more horrible but necessary than fun and an important piece of my life. There's a level of "horrible" given I have to do it, vs my options, but my options are worse - in my perspective. I don't want to turn into one of those crazy homeless people that have been on the streets in the same place for 20 years!

I have a job here, but they don't care to have the schedule sheet available for me so I can sign up for hours. They don't call when hours are open, even though I'M ON CALL. And, the only person on call, at that! I'm looking for another job, with no luck until school is back in session which will only give me 3 or 4 months in my current situation to work EVERYTHING out. Aside form my traveling stuff I have other reasonableness to my current situation. Outside of my situation, I can't find a new place to live in town on my budget. It would be counterproductive to move outside of town, because i don't have a car to come back into town at will. And, the bus system here can't give a single care about stuff like that. I have only a few friends with cars, and they also have their own lives to live. I won't have any gas money for them, either. You know, because I live out of town where there are no jobs, and too far away to get to a job, so I'll have no job, no money, no ride. 

What should I do? What CAN I do? This whole thing looks hopeless, now.

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